Why Forensic Biology Is Really A How To Get Away With Murder Class

By Emma “Monty” Montesdeoca, Staff Writer

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A crime scene. One victim, no evidence, no suspect. The police have no clues and no idea where to start. Why? Because the unknown suspect took Forensic Biology during high school and learned how to get away with murder scot-free. The suspect learned how to erase evidence, any witnesses, and even how to not become a suspect! The class is inspiring a new generation to commit the stabby-killy and stay out of prison with indictment. 

The class is an informative elective that focuses around the methods and techniques of different Forensic Scientists and how they play a major role in solving crimes. The class can cover things such as crime scene observations, blood spatter typing, and DNA analysis among other aspects of forensics. It provides insight on investigation through science and the methods police and investigators use to catch the suspects. It is a great class when it comes to useful application outside of school and into a real career, and the teachers, Mrs. Estrada and Mrs. Manthey, make the class enjoyable to learn in.

Although the class and the teachers try to focus on how forensics is used for good, it can also be judged as a Murder 101 class. This is where the new generation of murderers may go to learn how to get away with murdering their ex-wife with a wrench in the living room, and where the serial killers learn what a profile is and how to make a statement with their signature kill style. It is an excellent place to learn how not to get caught by any type of evidence or eyewitness and how not to be considered a suspect in a case. Murder 101 also covers old cases and reviews aspects of them that either caught the killer or let them get away, which provides excellent insight and inspiration for the young murderers of today. 

Whether the class is called Forensic Biology or Murder 101, it is instructive to anyone who takes it. Whether that person is looking to get away from four different murder cases or just wants some insight on how forensic invesitgators solve crimes, the class is definitely one of the most practical electives a person could take. It’s is an excellent place to learn how to catch people using science, or how not to be caught by the good guys using the same science. Now, all that’s left to do is to get the class name changed to Murder 101 or Pre-Murder.

 

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