I don’t know about you, but I’m sick and tired of people lying to me. First, my parents lied about the Tooth Fairy. Now it seems like the entire world is doing the exact same thing. There are so many products in our lives that have been advertised as “strong,” “beneficial,” and even “CDC-approved,” but they are all LIES! It seems like this entire world is full of fakes, and I’m ready to expose them!

Everyone loves fast food, especially the brands seen in commercials. The burgers are always stuffed with 100% beef and crisp vegetables with the cheese just cascading down the side. Oh, and don’t forget the glowing bun with organic sesame seeds! The fries are all beautiful and stand upright. In commercials, there are no such things as short or bendy fries. Every single item is photoshopped to perfection and ready to hit Food Network’s Vogue edition.

However, they are not ready to hit our stomachs. You know why? Because they’re all fake! You know why all those fries are so straight? Because they’re taped to the box! Why is that cheese melted to perfection? Because it’s actually yellow paint! And why is that bun glowing? Because they dipped it in BABY OIL!

The food industry is just one big sham. Their sleek designs and vibrant colors immediately grab your attention. Were you in the middle of a conversation? Well, not anymore because the TV has entranced you! Next, they use ultra-ASMR sounds to entice your audio senses. The fizzing of a nice, cold Coke or the sizzling of a beef patty on the grill appeal to your senses. And don’t worry if your body starts tingling because that’s just the ASMR effect. Anyway, you are now a slave to the company’s agenda. They have successfully made you crave their product.

But, you are strong! You yell “NO” at the TV and look in your fridge for some healthier options; but suddenly, everything  seems extremely unappetizing. So, you run out of your house and drive to the nearest fast food chain.

Obviously, the first one you arrive at is McDonalds. You approach the doors and are instantly bombarded with a list of life-threatening facts about the food. Instead of leaving, you simply ignore the sign and walk in. You expect to find a teenage girl with a friendly smile to take your order, but instead you meet a sort of gremlin-looking creature that shouts at you to order something already. So far, the commercial seems to be a lie, BUT you still ignore these vital differences because all you can think about is that beautiful cheeseburger with a side of fries.

When the food comes out, you are ecstatic. You can feel the saliva making your shirt wet, but you really don’t care at this point. ALL YOU WANT IS FOOD! You sit at a table prepared to eat with a big smile on your face. The first thing you pull out of the bag is an order of large fries, and your smile instantly turns into a frown. The fries are all bendy and cold. Furthermore, they have a sickly yellow color to them instead of the golden yellow you saw earlier. However, you don’t let this completely upset you, and you move on to your cheeseburger. This time, your frown turns into an angry lip tremble. The bun is mushy and too big for the patty, and the vegetables all seem to be dead. What’s more, the patty seems like it was heated in a frickin’ microwave!

Meanwhile, the employees look at you and laugh. You have once again become a victim to false advertising.