There has been lots of contention on how early people should start celebrating Christmas. Some claim that it can ONLY happen after Thanksgiving has happened, with others celebrating it as early as the day after Halloween. Costco Some stores I cannot name for totally real legal reasons put some Christmas decorations up on December 26, so the store always has great, time-relevant decorations on display for the masses (with a Costco Card). To really find out when it is truly appropriate to start celebrating Christmas, I sat down for an interview with Santa Claus and a super secret guest [REDACTED].
My interview with Mr. Claus was very very difficult as I had forgotten he lived in the North Pole, till I walked out of the sleigh in nothing but a pair of shorts and a T-shirt. The interview was quite odd as I kept on seeing lots of ALMOST humanoid creatures running around, silently. This was VERY off-putting to say the least, and I was not having a very good time in below 0-degree weather. The actual interview went smoothly, with Mr. Claus stating that ¨The army does start really working hard as soon as June or July rolls around. We only really put the decorations up for the year around Mid-Late November, as that’s when Hollywood swings by to start shooting all the Christmas Movies.¨ When I asked why he called them his ¨Army¨ instead of his workers he probably said something along the lines of ¨If I ever feel like invading a small country again like Uruguay back in ´84, I have that in my back pocket.¨ (The cold was REALLY getting to me at this time). The commute back wasn’t that bad either, however, I did wake up in a large pile of snow in the middle of nowhere, adding to the mystery of Santa Claus.
The other Interview I got was with the (drumroll please…) Thanksgiving Turkey! , and I decided to choose the annually pardoned Thanksgiving Turkey. The biggest issue I encountered with this interview was that I could not understand either the Turkey or the translator I found, who was also a turkey. I had to end up pointing to different images in relation to Christmas (mainly a calendar and 1 photo I took with Mr, Claus), and I had to pray that turkeys followed standard English-speaking conventions and tones. I took a wild guess in saying that they maybe possibly don’t like Christmas being celebrated this early in the year, as it takes up valuable time for their holiday.Â
In the end, I realized that Santa Claus has an army, and I do NOT want to be on the opposing side of Mr. Claus, therefore we should celebrate Christmas the entire year.
